Jane and God.

I titled this post as 'Jane and God' because they are gonna be the main characters. I hope that through this story, we, as Christians, can all know how to suffer well, do good while we're suffering and have God as the centre of our hearts always. I wrote this talk for my strand group at NTE just a couple of days ago and because we weren't given too much time to write it, I couldn't use more verses that I wanted to originally. I've decided to blog about it so that it stays permanent (instead of on some paper that I always chuck away after some session). Bear with me if you find it hard to read due to whatever reasons you may have.. here goes nothing..

This is a story, a true story, about Jane and her friends.

Jane was in high school years ago and got to meet Leonard and Guy. They subsequently became close friends and even formed a band together. They played music, did sports, ate, skipped classes and the list goes on. They are what you would call - ''a clique''.

A bit more about Jane. She's Christian - but she once turned her back on God, and you'll soon know the reason why if you read on...

*show* 1 Peter 2: 21 - 25. (go open your Bible if you haven't already, but to save you some time....)

I'm focusing particularly on vv 23 - 25 where it reads on v23,

"when they hurled their insults at him, he did not retaliate; when he suffered, he made no threats. Instead, he entrusted himself to him who judges justly."

You might think that if one's been a Christian for quite a while now, even if trials come along, he or she probably wouldn't fall away too much from Christianity. But Jane was different...

When Guy called Jane one day (in a gentle tone - too gentle that Jane sensed that something was amiss) saying..

''Jane, I have something to tell you.."

"Yeah Guy? What's wrong?"

''Leonard.. Leonard passed away in a car accident this morning..His friend, the driver, survived. But Leonard did not."

Jane's world collapsed. Her hands were shaking so much she couldnt get a grip on the phone properly, she cried and cried and cried. She could feel that her heart was so broken as if it can never be repaired. Jane, being a believer of God, asked, 

''GOD! GOD! WHY! WHY! Why did the good person have to die and not the one who probably deserved to? Why did you not save him?! How could you do this?!"'

Jane couldn't sleep nor eat for days. She couldn't stop crying and often retreated into her bedroom and just - cried. She also turned to alcohol and sleeping drugs and got into arguements regularly for no good reason. She was full of anger and spared hardly anyone with her wrath. Things only got worse 2 months later when Jane got another call from Guy. This time it went like this..

"Jane, Leonard's mother killed herself."

And that was a day before Jane's 21st birthday.

Jane fought so hard with God. She didn't understand why God allowed all of it to happen. Jane walked so far away from God that she didn't know how to find her way back even though sometimes deep down, she wanted to but felt that she's been so bad that God probably doesn't want her back.

But that's wasn't God's plan. He did not give Jane up at all. He constantly placed people around Jane to encourage her and to not give up on helping her find her way back to Jesus. He showed her that He still loves her amidst all her wrongdoings. Jane's close Christian friends made sure that she was eating, made sure that they talked to her and prayed for her and some even begged her to not give up on reading the Bible. He also told Jane this...

1 Peter 2: 24,

"He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, so that we might die to sin and live for righteousness; by his wounds you have been healed."

This verse tells us that whatever we have done wrong, God had gotten Jesus, His only son(!), to take the punishment for us sinful humans. 

And in 1 Peter 2: 25,

"For you were like sheep going astray, but now you have returned to the Shepherd and overseer of your souls." 

Jane is like that lost sheep who went astray. Christ is the good shepherd who layed down His life for His sheep, and also the good shepherd who did not let a single one of His sheep go. Because every sheep is precious to our good shepherd.. 

Jane is now back on track with God even though I know that sometimes she still feels very broken-hearted of the events that happened. But now she also knows one more thing which is that she can always seek refuge in Jesus Christ. Jesus - the good person, who was and is sinless yet CHOSE TO die for sinners. 

I don't know how you feel after hearing this story, you might feel a lot for Jane BUT, that is not my intention. I don't want you to focus too much on Jane's situation in itself but instead, to see how God can work through His actions and His word (the Bible!) in such a situation. He comforts, heals, and will always be there. 

So, I urge you.. to not give up even when you're suffering (or if you know someone who is, don't give up on encouraging them!) because God is working in our lives everyday. ..

a temporary goodbye.

So my weekend was filled with parties and fun stuff - so it seems. But a big thing happened and it kinda made me really upset (just think of me without a coke can x100000000000000). I kid. The coke thing is really quite incomparable actually. That heartburning sensation that I've felt before, is here again.

Ben's passing was sudden. Before he passed on I was just thinking of him because I remember writing this funny/weird bookface status and thought to myself - "I wonder when Ben will 'like' this. He's probably gonna be the first to 'like' this sorta statuses."

But he never did and will never 'like' things again. I miss Ben but I know it's okay because he's in heaven with Jesus now and that is much cooler than sitting on your chair 'liking' stuff. I'm just glad he's in a comfortable place and I look forward to seeing him next time.

He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away." 
- Revelation 21:4

Major Camp Hangover

had an awesome weekend away with a great group of people.
learnt so much more about relationships (deeper issues).
bonded with friends and got to know them better. one in particular became my snotty tissue buddy (which I thought was pretty spectacular).

Before I leave, just wanna slot in one of my fav verse from the book of Proverbs.

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths."


Proverbs 3: 5-6.

SOOK

It has dawned on me that I have less than 5 months left in this beautiful city. And people back 'home' are not exactly helping matters (I'm not blaming them - don't get me wrong) when they ask questions like,

"when are you coming back?"      
"Don't know. Stop asking."
"i can't wait for you to be back!"    
"If I could, I'd rather not." 
"what are you gonna do when you come back?"      
"I don't know. And if you've asked this before, I would recommend that you stop asking the same question because I.DONT.KNOW."
"when you come back, we can go do *this* *this* *this* and *this."
"I'd rather not. Leave me alone. Don't plan things for me if I didn't give you the green light."


The lines in blue are just what i feel like answering. I actually say different things to people because I am not normally that rude. I would still answer your questions properly if I know you mean no harm.

Yeah so I am currently trying to spend as much quality time with the people here that I love. But somewhere inside me, there's just this increase of sadness as days go past. Okay I'm just being mean because if I were to be going somewhere exciting (i.e. the States or  Europe), I wouldn't feel whatever I feel right now (or so I think).

Expectations. It scares me a lot. The whole 'you will have to work, work, work, and we expect this much from you' - scares me a big lot. It annoys me when I'm not known as *inserts own name* but as 'my father's daughter' (i.e Miss *inserts last name*). Because I think as much as I know it's tough, I do want my own identity.

And I feel like I have my own identity here. Which is why I never want to leave..

Sook is me, me is Sook. Even that word has an identity of its own.

La Di Da

Some of the friends I know I will miss dearly when I leave..

Today, I thank God for friends like them.

Bringin' Bloggy Back!

Wanted to change the address but i just love pikieandthebrain too much. Decided to delete everything I've written in the past ultimately but I did do a recap before.


I've grown to be thankful these days. I think being out of my comfort zone helped a lot and this is something to be grateful for! Not that I wasn't in the past, but maybe I was grateful on a more superficial level then. So I remember thanking heaps of people on my birthday this one year and the last on the list, was first on the heart - then.


Now? He's just trash. Like this.


feelings are transient - they will pass. 
and i'm glad they do...