a temporary goodbye.

So my weekend was filled with parties and fun stuff - so it seems. But a big thing happened and it kinda made me really upset (just think of me without a coke can x100000000000000). I kid. The coke thing is really quite incomparable actually. That heartburning sensation that I've felt before, is here again.

Ben's passing was sudden. Before he passed on I was just thinking of him because I remember writing this funny/weird bookface status and thought to myself - "I wonder when Ben will 'like' this. He's probably gonna be the first to 'like' this sorta statuses."

But he never did and will never 'like' things again. I miss Ben but I know it's okay because he's in heaven with Jesus now and that is much cooler than sitting on your chair 'liking' stuff. I'm just glad he's in a comfortable place and I look forward to seeing him next time.

He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away." 
- Revelation 21:4

Major Camp Hangover

had an awesome weekend away with a great group of people.
learnt so much more about relationships (deeper issues).
bonded with friends and got to know them better. one in particular became my snotty tissue buddy (which I thought was pretty spectacular).

Before I leave, just wanna slot in one of my fav verse from the book of Proverbs.

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths."


Proverbs 3: 5-6.

SOOK

It has dawned on me that I have less than 5 months left in this beautiful city. And people back 'home' are not exactly helping matters (I'm not blaming them - don't get me wrong) when they ask questions like,

"when are you coming back?"      
"Don't know. Stop asking."
"i can't wait for you to be back!"    
"If I could, I'd rather not." 
"what are you gonna do when you come back?"      
"I don't know. And if you've asked this before, I would recommend that you stop asking the same question because I.DONT.KNOW."
"when you come back, we can go do *this* *this* *this* and *this."
"I'd rather not. Leave me alone. Don't plan things for me if I didn't give you the green light."


The lines in blue are just what i feel like answering. I actually say different things to people because I am not normally that rude. I would still answer your questions properly if I know you mean no harm.

Yeah so I am currently trying to spend as much quality time with the people here that I love. But somewhere inside me, there's just this increase of sadness as days go past. Okay I'm just being mean because if I were to be going somewhere exciting (i.e. the States or  Europe), I wouldn't feel whatever I feel right now (or so I think).

Expectations. It scares me a lot. The whole 'you will have to work, work, work, and we expect this much from you' - scares me a big lot. It annoys me when I'm not known as *inserts own name* but as 'my father's daughter' (i.e Miss *inserts last name*). Because I think as much as I know it's tough, I do want my own identity.

And I feel like I have my own identity here. Which is why I never want to leave..

Sook is me, me is Sook. Even that word has an identity of its own.

La Di Da

Some of the friends I know I will miss dearly when I leave..

Today, I thank God for friends like them.

Bringin' Bloggy Back!

Wanted to change the address but i just love pikieandthebrain too much. Decided to delete everything I've written in the past ultimately but I did do a recap before.


I've grown to be thankful these days. I think being out of my comfort zone helped a lot and this is something to be grateful for! Not that I wasn't in the past, but maybe I was grateful on a more superficial level then. So I remember thanking heaps of people on my birthday this one year and the last on the list, was first on the heart - then.


Now? He's just trash. Like this.


feelings are transient - they will pass. 
and i'm glad they do...